Happy Mother's Day!

Being a mom is hard, is wonderful, is frightening, is awesome. I love my kids and miss them so much. Did I mention they live FAR away? He is out of town so I am alone today. But never really alone. He left me a nice card and called me from poolside in Phoenix. I'm OK though there are days I absolutely get so frustrated. I am frustrated that he can't see the truth--doesn't want to know the truth. I am frustrated that I am home alone most of the time when I could be enjoying my children and grandchildren. I am frustrated with my inability to function at a higher level. BUT gratefully these moments of deep discouragement are fleeting. I know I can have joy in the midst of the most difficult trial and these are not that difficult in the big scheme of things. After all, that's what this blog has been all about. Finding joy in the journey.
I felt a moment of that joy today. Actually twice...OK probably more than that as I think about it. But let me share two. At the end of our Sacrament meeting our Bishop spoke about a Primary teacher he remembered. She was definitely flawed in many ways but he remembers how much she loved him. He wasn't the best behaved boy in class (hard to imagine since he is so calm) but still she loved him. He said something at the end of relating this story that pierced my soul as if it had been said to me as a message from my Heavenly Father. He said "She loved us with all our imperfections...and we loved her with all of hers." I could hear Father saying to me "I love you! Yes, even with all your imperfections." It felt good. And it reminded me that He loves even those in my life who I allow to cause me grief. And with His help I can love them too. I know my husband drinks coffee and beer, but I like to live in denial that he does. Today he mentioned it and it was frustrating to be reminded. But I had that moment that Stephen Covey talks about between stimulus and response we have a space in which we can choose. I chose to not make it into an exchange that would end badly. He knows how I feel about it. I don't need to harp. I chose to love him.
The second experience came as I was listening to Music and the Spoken Word. The Tabernacle Choir was singing God So Loved the World. It was beautiful and as I sat alone I felt myself reaching for my Savior...almost literally but really only figuratively---and I felt (figuratively but almost felt literal) Him reaching toward me touching my arm. How grateful I was in that moment to be reminded yet again that He loves me and wants to bless me.
He loves you! And in His strength we can bless the people in our lives.

1 John 4: 9-11 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.

Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.