Yet again...With God NOTHING shall be impossible!

The next few years all seem to flow one into the next. It was challenging because of the difficulty I felt in loving him.
"The moment a partner fears that he or she may have fallen out of love with the other partner is the moment when the opportunity for genuine love begins. It is perhaps the moment when a readiness for a step up in spiritual maturation has arrived. it is the moment when we realize what great power we have to bless the person to whom we are married, and how much power we have to cause unnecessary pain. Shall we commit the ultimate selfish act and abandon spouse and children in the search fro another partner, shattering trust and breaking the hearts of many in the hopes of some greater fulfillment in love? This is a phantom desire, born of deception. What a tragedy such a decision is, since the only fulfillment one can ever have is that arising out of righteousness! The restless partner must look, then, at the ways in which he could restore and enrich the original love, nurture his spouse, and unlock the blessings of heaven on the marriage....My witness is that there are special blessings reserved for those who devote themselves to making marriage work, blessings that are realized in this life and in the life to come: hidden treasures of the Spirit, reserved for those who would be gods" (Spiritual Lightening, M. Catherine Thomas).
I knew what I wanted to do. I wanted to become like my Father in Heaven and my Savior. I wanted to be filled with the love they have. I wanted to bless a life not destroy it. I knew that if I would continue to walk His path He would bless and strengthen me. I knew that it was more important for me to forgive and love than to punish. It was difficult not to react or blame or correct. There were ample opportunities to do so, but that is not who I wanted to be. I had come to know my Savior well enough to know that I wanted to become like Him however slow the process or how long it would take. I would "act as if" until I could become. So I acted like I loved him.
"Perhaps one of the most important views of life to embrace is that this life is a series of tutorials designed to give us experience, to develop the divine nature, and to send us to the Lord Jesus Christ, the Master Teacher and Keeper of Grace" (Spiritual Lightening, M. Catherine Thomas).